Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Survival


It is risky, it is tough
To stand up from the pain
To lay the frontier of survival

It is striving it is difficult
To sit up for the course
To accepts the failure of survival

It is hard it is terrible
To live up from the faults
To surrender the fortune of survival

Spark of stage fright

What know what?
How know how
I am Mr. Confusion
How do you do?

Yes or no
Come or go
I am Mr. Doubt
What can I do?

Can or could
Do or don’t
I am Mr. Discouragement
Pleas to meet your

Will or won’t
Might or might not
I am Mr. Suspicion
Farewell to you!

A true friend


A true friend


No one is friendly than he .



No one is more than a father than he



No one has done a more sacrifice than he



No one is as special to me than, he



The Lord Jesus Christ that, we see.



The lord that died for you and for me



How grate a family we have in him



Who abided us all in his love and care?



For a life in eternity

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Dreams

Dreams have no language
like Das' but a pantomime
which remain Dreams alone
And at my wake in this new dawn
realised,last night some magical hands
had operated,like a Televions' remote
makng me mute.
Like a screen voiceless did i remain
full 'f expressions.
May be its a sport for the all seeing eyes.

Suddenly soft but cold hands shook me,
called me by name
To my suprise,at wake found lot of heads
around my bed,examining clinically!!!!
To my apprehensions I recognised them as Doctor's
trying to cut open me,
made me scream N......O!!!!!
But then visions were clear....
And heard Amma calling "Y....E...S!!!!"
Get up.......
My Dreams....Life given empire
collapse 'nd perspire
Into a mere windowful wind
Promising to return,yet another day.

Life

Visions open up to 'd
sounds of nature
Embracing 'd vemillion glow,
I trot and trot
pecking the grains of solitude.
I see the chair and 'd light.
Lantern voices that reverberate
retrieve me to 'd
festivity of life.

I see the flowers bloom
with their mighty face held high,
smiling at 'd perenial source of light
And 'd mirthful butterflies
fluttering all along bouting their joy
to 'd beholders eyes....

Perhaps embracig the dark
makes them dance so well!!!
Watching this truly Inspires
Should We learn and rejoice.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Coping with life in small doses.

“ I know you won’t talk to me”, she shot back.

It had done nothing good, instead had infuriated his senses, for the reason that he felt her way of tossing words was just to force an equalizer for the probable accusations, he might have thrown at her. She had well anticipated the things. She didn’t want overwork on that, as she always had lived like that. Planned and pursued her way for she was like some of the other girls. Nervous and suspicious without the confidence level to put herself across.

“ I know you wouldn’t”. Her words echoed over his head once again.

“You know nothing”. He said casually. The air inside the pantry was warm. She was still. Sailing as always. But enough for him to catch that frozen look. He may have continued his eulogy, but she opted out to resist him with her shimmering coldness.

“ You know nothing because you are talking senseless stuff.” He said then.

“ I didn’t talk senseless”. Said she.

“ You may not have. But you don’t know a thing.” He supposed staring at the postures on the wall and the doors that seems like those revolving ones.

She brought coffee and sandwiches and sat beside him. Her expression already reflected that she’d absorbed whatever the atmosphere had set. That was not without purpose. He had to put it that way. He didn’t like to be bottled like that and he hated that since his childhood. He would be selfish and sensitive.

They hadn’t seen each other for months. They had certainly avoided the meetings every time. If she had taken the initiative to haphazard any contact at the first place, when he might be earning to meet her badly. It would be his turn to skip off from her mails and calls. Both of them sailed in distance and never tried to touch their canoes, in fact sometimes wanting to. But their canoes did meet. It has always touched and moved like preachers.

The distance however had aggravated more as they slowed calling each other not once in a week and then for months. Now it’s after 6 months, the guy didn’t wonder they still kept that distractive sort of attraction. Their decisions were promising like some couple postponing their first child of some untold realities. Whenever they suspected love’s awakening, they’d blow it off. They’d thrashed every bud that hoped to bloom above their reach.

She said softly then. “ I meant what I said ”.

He retorted. “If it were an insult, I would think to love that. I know its not. It’s a blame you’re trying to pick out.”
“What do you mean?”. She said, looking into his eyes. The cup in her hand trembled and the coffee escaped on to the saucer and to the table.

“You want me to believe that I kicked everything. You don’t need to transmit that any long. I know that. I perfectly believe that it’s my initiative for all this and don’t you think to take any credit of that.” He said in a brief stint.

“Your words are rude, aren’t they?” Her eyes seem moistened.

“Okay. I did mean to say that, do you want anyone to be made clear of this?”

She was in a way avoiding her shock when countered by his words. He was like that forever. When any crisis would turn up eventually, he would talk sentences full from different plots, and she would find herself in a whirl that will be static and complicated as usual.

“Now, what’s this all you are speaking to me?”

“Just nothing dear. Something that really doesn’t matter. It will also pass.” He poured more coffee into the cup.

“You don’t understand and you will never.” Said the girl.

“ That doesn’t mean a thing ”.

“ That does. You haven’t given a thought on things.”

“ I need your say. I know we will be happy together. Bangalore is a great place. We can move sooner then.” He drew invisible images on the table with his fingers.

“Will we be?”

“ Certainly. I don’t know about your parents. I know you and that’s what I know when I think of you. That’s what’s important.”

“ Meeting my parents is as important.”

“ Okay if I talk to them, what can I hear from you.”

“ I will not say against. I will not say anything more.”

The guy stood up holding the cup and the saucer. She was staring at him while trying in vain to help him out. He had almost finished washing the cups when the girl had stepped into the washroom.

“What’s happening to you?” She said glancing through the mirror for his reply. Water splashed over the ceramic and metal plates leaving them sparkling in pride.

The girl waited for him to finish or for her to start off. “I haven’t said NO. Iam thinking on. My decisions are important and I know we will be happy ever after, but they have not. Marriage means so much to them like us. You know we have to abide. I don’t know what if I would say or I wouldn’t. My thoughts are getting varied.”

“ Will you please…” The guy muttered aloud. Even he was surprised by that sudden retort, if it was too early. He may not have regretted that. The door banged, and the guy turned around thinking she might have gone. The girl was still waiting at the corner rubbing her hand. Two other guys came in and he waved at them before following her out.

At the corridor She and her friend waited to part. In fact he had to stay there for quite sometime for the machine to turn up. They didn’t have much to tell. A smile passed them and they waved back. Then they smiled, first at themselves and at each other. The lift opened up when he was about to say something. She went in and waved.

He said. “Spike your hair!!”. She too laughed and returned the code. “ Pass me your wig, if you dare!!”.

She will have reached the next building where she works. The guy drifted into his cabin. He told several hundred lies to his manager on being late. Of which one was that, he was going to marry the girl. He then sat behind the system, behind his e-mails and behind himself and watched.